I have a book about special quotes from mothers to sons, and I just love it. One of my friends has 4 boys and 2 girls, and also enjoys reading this book. Today our boys played outside on a water slide, and it was so fun to watch them through the window. Boys seem to take about 20 or 30 minutes to "figure out" how to play nicely--a few shoves then a few warnings from Mom, a few trials of king of the mountain then a few warnings, then all of a sudden the pecking order has been established and they can just PLAY. I love the chaos and activity that children bring---my experience at home is just with boys, but the laughter and joy a child brings into the house is one of God's greatest gifts in my opinion. I love the honest phrases (Mommy, is that another baby in your tummy? Well, no dear....), the good morning hugs, the one more book at bedtime procrastination, the fact that they will come down dark halls at night to our room just for comfort; I cherish the happy songs (you do know that screaming is a beautiful form of music, right??), the way they "politely" say "I don't want dinner, I want snack, Please!," the way they pray for a friend's grandmother who has cancer, or are willing to give up their birthday presents to donate to a baby in China who needs help. I LOVE watching my three stand up for each other, fight and make up with one another, and protect one another. I am so thrilled that my boys have a sensitive side. Jack, my 3 year old, is always concerned about where the Mommies and Daddies are.So, if we are reading Thomas the Train, he wants to know where is Thomas's mommy and daddy? At his young age, he KNOWS that everyone and everything should have parents. He already knows this is how you love. You need a Mommy and a Daddy to be there, to cheer you on, to wipe your tears, to have when you are scared at night, to discipline you and teach you right from wrong, to pray for you, and with you, and to teach you about God and His love, and to just BE THERE, wherever, whenever. As adults, we tend to get so busy. Our jobs, our chores, our errands, our kids activites....the list goes on and on, but we get so busy we do not notice the beauty and love around us. We take for granted the screaming 'song' (be quiet! ), or get annoyed at night when our kids come down (guilty as charged!), but these are the gifts God has given us---I know I overlook the beauty around me at times....until I stop, I pray, I listen, and I hear. Children are our future...and they all need a Mommy and a Daddy to guide them there.
From the book "Mother to Son: Shared Wisdom from the Heart" by Melissa and Harry Harrison:
At times, you will be blown away by the depth of your love for him.
Realize that from day one, he's wired to be self-reliant. Don't change that.
You'll remember his laughter at this age forever.
Right around the age of 3, he will heroically start to think he is your protector. This never goes away.
Don't forget: Praise is contagious. So is criticism.
Tell him he had a great game, even if there is overwhelming evidence to the contrary. He just needs to hear you say it.
Remember , boys show their affection by wrestling, pushing, and bumping into one another.
Teach him to be kind.
As wild as they might be, little boys need hugs and security. So do big ones.
He will idolize his dad.
Give him a Valentine's Day Card every year. He'll say i's corny, but secretly he'll always look forward to it!
Talk to him often about God's grace and he'll grow up seeing it.
Don't tolerate meanness.
Make sure his home is a haven of love and peace.
Tell yourself, "He's not angry, he's not an alien, he's not mental. He's just 13."
Keep kissing him goodnight, even if he does not kiss back.
Teach him how he can earn your respect: always speaking the truth, keeping his grades up, treating all family memberswith kindness, doing his chores, and seeking to serve others.
Hold him accountable for his actions.
If you are constantly criticizing him, something is wrong. With you.
Teach him that sharing what he has is one of the keys to happiness.
Treat him like the man you want him to become.
Tell him you will always love him.
He will tell you that you're the best mom in the world.
Hug him fiercely.
Let him go.
LOVE. GUIDANCE. SHARING. FAITH. HOPE. All children need them. I am grateful what my boys have taught me! Tomorrow, stop, pause, and look for the beauty God has placed around you. It is everywhere...we only have to look.
Love,
Eve
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