The last few years have been the beginning of a long overdue metamorphosis for me. Marriage to my best friend now 18 years, 4 children, homeschool, adoption….all of these amazing gifts of life have also changed me. Some days there were huge blows, but most days there have been tiny scratches to my soul. I am a pleaser by nature (think about Maya Angelou's quote re: "wearing catcher's mitt on both hands"..that would be me). I am also a conflict avoider and stuff it inside kind of person. But, all of the aforementioned gifts need a better mom, wife, and friend. They need the healthiest me I can give them….physically and SPIRITUALLY.
William and I have worked together on how to best parent our children. A large portion of our game plan came from first recognizing what WE bring to the table with parenting. (Yes, adoptive friends, we are hooked on Karyn Purvis and The Connected Child). We have had to develop code words for each other.
SIMPLIFY
PRIORITIES
EXPECTATIONS
Trying to keep my focus on these 3 words has started to change who I am, how I respond, and how I connect to others. Life on Earth is short. We hold such power in our words and in our actions. I know this, but when I really HEAR this, it drops me to my knees. I am not worthy of this power. I screw it up every single day. I need help. I need Jesus. I need supportive friends. I need Jesus. I need my husband to keep my focus, my strength. I need Jesus. I fall back on my "on my goodness did those words actually just come out of my mouth" self way too easily. That is why I must simplify. For me, this means not saying yes to everything. I am the queen of the sign up sheets. BRING IT ON. This phenomena has improved slightly since moving to homeschool, but I am still too quick to sign up. SIMPLIFY. It is okay to say no sometimes. I must examine my PRIORITIES too. What are my goals? To be the coolest mom out there (let's all hope not as my kids roll their eyes). Setting my priorities along with William will help us focus on the things most important to us. Lastly, EXPECTATIONS. I have talked a lot recently with my kids about expectations and disappointments. They go hand in hand. The middle boys have written a lot about the Good Samaritan in their tutorial work. It has opened up a huge discussion for expectations, and shortly after that, Empowered to Connect sent out an email on that very topic. (YES, God I HEAR you!).
DISCLAIMER: I just found this post that I never finished. We ended up moving shortly after this so life became a whirlwind. Simplify….paused. Priorities….pretty good. Expectations…..ahem. Now Florie and I are 1/2 years plus older. It is time to reset, refocus. SIMPLIFY. PRIORITIES. EXPECTATIONS. Did I mention I screw up daily? But if you see me, know these are the goals. You can even say these words to me. I need you to. I need Jesus to. My words and actions are monitored everyday by 4 young people who will take apiece of me into their adult lives. I know which piece I pray that will be!
Love,
Eve
“There comes a time in your life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh. Forget the bad, and focus on the good. Love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don't. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.”
― José N. Harris
Proverbs 18:21 The tongue has the power of life and death; and those who love it will eat its fruit
Isaiah 40:31
but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
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